Our time together... l ̲̅ə̲̅٨̲̅٥̲̅٦̲̅] ♥

Thursday, December 28, 2017

很混乱

Today after playing ML, I told V
Grace gonna be busy cuz Thad call her, so need pei bf cannot ml.
Only I so free cuz I no bf.
He said, who say I don't have, u now mling with him

Ever since I wished him happy birthday
(The only one this year)
I don't know is he lonely or just finding someone stupid to play with
He had been dropping hints or such making me confused AF
I really don't know. I always have the inferior complex.
When I was with him in 2011, I always feel that I'm not good enough for him
Always try my best to be a better me but I always succeed in making him angry.
I know I always play with fire, but I am too chicken to play this time.
I don't wanna end up not even friends.

People once said, if lovers still can be friends
either they never loved before, or they still are in love.
I admit I do have feelings for him all this while ever since I met him in 2009
If not I wouldn't have search his 32" sleeping pikachu high and low
begging here and there to get it no matter the price.
Though I kept it for a year or so, but I eventually gave it to him
Because I know he would be happy with it and would treasure it.

I seriously don't know is he playing around or serious.
I do not know am I thinking too much or not
But why would a ex bf from 6 years ago express interest in me again?
I'm 6000km away. 1 year before I can go back if I don't fail anything.
I asked him, 这么久了还会有感觉吗? He didn't reply me.
I told him my insecurities. He did not pacify me.
I really don't know what to think of this.
I really hoped for a acknowledgement
I wished he was the first one to wish me happy birthday. But he wasn't.
He only did so at 4pm my time, 1pm his time.
We were both awake at 12am both SG and AU time.

He only said, wait for me to be back before saying anything more.
反正他还是单身

I dont know.
Anyway just 1 more year to go.
Lets see what happen alright.

Sleep Tight, Goodnight~
Written by xImSelene 3:35:00 AM