Our time together... l ̲̅ə̲̅٨̲̅٥̲̅٦̲̅] ♥

Sunday, August 16, 2009

b0ib0i i have to say
u have changed
u aint that person i knew a wk ago
either my expectations for you raised
or ur sweetness dropped
or cuz i am oni waiting for that glimsp of u
or a sweet sentence from u
i nv did see u play with anyone else last wk
but den i see u playing with loads others this wk
u always will open rm b0i ;lub bear last wk
u oni openned once this wk
u nearly will pm me less den 5min after login last wk
u didnt pm me much
2day i emoing in room u pm me dear 3 times jiu log out
still got 1 or 2 days u log in u nv pm me at all

I AM LOST

we oni live once, cherish every single second, like u will die at the next

if i can rewind time go back to the past react my life again
i believe i will not be such a pathetic person like now

sometimes
i juz wish i can go back in time
i will cherish those times i had in sec sku
i will want to go back to sec1
still remembering i was smiling whole day long
with the word 'emo' or 'sian' in my dictionary
even though i was like a nerd
but things was at least happier

it was until sec 3
when i got a computer
i started to become an introvert
my communications skills wasnt very good alr
and becoming an introvert
i am like a bottle with the cap firmly on
u need to pris the cap open to drink
u need to force me ALOT to know whatever i thinking

i still rmb b4 i meet wes kor
i hated guys/males/bois
partially the reason is cuz my dad
having a extra maritial affair
making an incomplete family
having a breast cancer mother
who blames it on naughty kid(s) and the husband
where both made her hopping mad
BASED ON A STUPID IDIOT BOOK

i hated seeing loving families or rich kids
all i have is envy
i want whatever everyone else had
i want my father's love
i want a fat allowance each week
i want back the past where we were well-off
i want my mother to show me love
i dun wan her always foloing this foloing that
reiki qigong what rily helped? NONE
all was the work of the mind
mlm companies? u didn earn much i tink
from elken to melaluca to this whatever jap company
everytime u will sing praises of it
and till the end u will be saying this person whatever
that person whatever and saying the product expensive
and alot of complaints

how much do u know about ur daughter?
did u knw how many tears she shed?
u tot she didnt shed a tear until she see police
did u knw hw many bf she had?
did u knw hw many guys did immoral things to ur daughter?
did u knw what ur daughter rily wants?
i know what u want
u want me to be cooperative
be a nice kid
want me go to sku
have nice results
u want me to be like sis
the model daughter
the filal one the guai one the one who listens to u
i know the cancer cells has spread
i want to do smth that u reckon b4 i lose u for good
i want to be what u want me to be
but circumstanses dun let me be
i alr is the rebellious one
the uncooperative one

everytime smth bad happens to me
you oni know how to say i brought it upon myself
did u knw i juz wanted a sentence of comfort from you?
when i fever u will say play more play more
ur body alr topsy turvy from the day night switch
when i fall u oni knw hw say consequences of naughtiness
i know u care for me deep in your heart
thru actions actions that are not easily seen
but what i want is verbally and smth more easily known
u knw i hate father for abandoning us
u always like to say i am like him
u knw u made me hate myself
to me, u treat others better den me
im juz like a statue
wasting electricity everyday
wasting money everyday
and nothing to contribute to the household
u n sis wun talk to me untill i talk first
or smth i should do or need my help

I AM LOST

Sleep Tight, Goodnight~
Written by xImSelene 4:46:00 AM